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Bitch at Us: Mathew Ramsey of PornBurger

Washington, DC
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We sat down with self-proclaimed “burger pervert and doughnut enthusiast,” Mathew Ramsey of PornBurger. Mathew is not one to sit still for very long; he has a laundry list of spectacular skills and wears many hats from professional videographer and photographer, to culinary school graduate, to chef, to entrepreneur, to writer. His newest project and first book, PornBurger: Hot Buns and Juicy Beefcakes, is a cook-and-look book that is an ingredient-driven, flavor-intense, sensually divine excess that caters to the food fetishist in all of us. The book PornBurger is a perfectly practical coffee table book that will ignite conversations while also helping you design dinner and concoct creative creations. This is a must-have for all cookbook shelves and coffee tables.

Listen to Mathew speak about his new book and taste some delicious samples including gnocchi tots and kimchi tempura, this Wednesday. Your ticket includes a signed copy of his book, PornBuger: Hot Buns and Juicy Beefcakes. Indulge your naughtiest food fantasies from 7 p.m. until 9 p.m. Tickets are $37. Warning: This is event is not for the health conscious or faint of heart!

Just to give you a little taste of what you’re in for, here are some delectable creations from PornBurger. You can bet all us Bitches will have a signed copy in our libraries.

Bitch at Us: PornBurger

The Horn Dog: clover honey, whole kernel corn jalapeño batter, slow-roasted pork belly, pickled hot dog, and two smash-cooked beef patties; the James Francophile: quick pickled beets, truffled demi-glace, Gruyère de Comté, one beef patty, bone marrow onion jam, and potato-chip-crusted fois gras gougère; and the I Woke Up Like This: Sriracha mustard, arugula, smoked bacon, American cheese, fried chicken thigh, quick-pickled hamburger dills, and White Castle cheeseburger waffle.

I Woke Up Like This

So, why burgers? Why not tacos, hot dogs, nachos…salads?

Haha–I think we can all agree that PornSalad doesn’t quite have the same ring to it. I find I work best creatively, when I’m given confines to work within. For me, the burger was the perfect medium for me to explore, explode, and reconstruct week after week. It also just so happens to be delicious. 

What inspired you to create PornBurger? Break it down for us.

Looking back, PornBurger was basically the inevitable culmination of all my passions uniting… A sort of pervy Voltron megabot if you will; Burgers, bad puns, photography, and ingredient-driven, culinary explorations! As for the name, like all good ideas, PornBurger came to me in the shower. 

Tell us about your new book, PornBurger: Hot Buns and Juicy Beefcakes.

So, PornBurger: Hot Buns and Juicy Beefcakes is a choose-your-own-adventure guide to engineering your own burger-gasms. A paint by numbers porn rag. The first third of the book is a lineup of my own raunchy fantasies, and then I break it down by patty, condiments, buns, etc., so that you can mix and match your creations to meet your own personal burger kinks. 

Bitch at Us: PornBurger

What prompted you to write a cook-and- look book?

I wanted to write a book that could be a helpful companion in the kitchen, but also a guilty pleasure you could secretly store under your mattress.

What can people expect from this meaty-masterpiece?

So many bad jokes. But also, I talk about how to make the perfect patty (from beef to lobster), how to make your own condiments, pickles, buns, and even accompanying sides (like crispy gnocchi tater tots), and adult beverages. 

 What was the biggest challenge you faced during the writing and creative process?

I’ve heard that the hardest part about writing, is actually just sitting down to write. As someone who constantly loves to push forward, sitting down to recreate certain late night culinary trysts was challenging. 

What project are you most proud of? Your website, book, dinner series, or other?

Well I suppose the website is what enabled the other two, so I’ll stick to my roots. For me, the best part has been having the opportunity to collaborate with fellow D.C. creative people and makers. 

Calicornication

What do you think about the D.C. food scene?

I love D.C. The fact that the District’s food scene is exploding with new concepts and talent, only makes me love it more. It’s a total wild west of possibilities, driven by local makers, farmers, and food entrepreneurs. It’s a very exciting time to be a denizen of D.C. 

What’s up next for you? 

I have a couple of buns in the oven. Am I using that phrase correctly? I’m looking forward to throwing a lot more events this summer and working on a possible ingredient-driven, TV development.  

Do you have a favorite burger topping, technique, or style?

I’m an absolute sucker for a secret burger sauce. There’s something so enticing about a good, ol’ fashioned mystery box. 

Bloody Marys or mimosas?

I’m an omnivore, with a penchant for gluttony… Can I not have both? I want to make sure I cover all my basic food groups. 

Brunch in or out?

Brunch in bed will always win. As a card carrying member of Team Waffle, I have three different waffle irons that I like to flex. Throw in some sausage gravy and an oozing egg, and I’m purring like a kitten. 

If you had to invite five people to brunch, who would they be?

Bill Murray, President Obama, Emma Watson, Jason Schwartzman, and Aubrey Plaza… Your invitations are in the mail. Call me. 

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